40daysbefore40 day 7: new years eve love and light xxx

 dreamtime

limbo

the space between the old and the new

the pause after the out breath and before the next breath in

between dusk and dawn

may the seeds of appreciation of the year passing over take root in the soil of your year to come

peace

shalom

shanti

xxx

ok...so maybe this post is a cop out...a hardly there snippet of my presence for today...and yet the profundity and beauty of the day...dancing with tribe...remembering, honouring, letting go, taking with, dancing it all out and in with breath after breath, wave after wave...witnessing and being witnessed...wings still forming after a year of emerging, not quite ready to fly but on the edge...found my arms, my breath, my way home...found my heart and my tenderness...insight and inspiration...clarity and the sifting sieving for gold from all the lead...and willing to dare...YES!!..finally, a week in and a dare to claim as my own!...standing up in front of about 60 folk, present and belly centred...offering my epitaph for 2012...being received...being receptive..being seen and being heard...halleluyah!!

blessings and love to you all on this portal potent pirouette into the unknown....see you next year ;-)

xxx

  

   

a little night conversation...

its always the hours of the limbo time that awaken some portal of clarity within my soul...typing to you in the darkness, my fingers trusting their way to find the right notes on the keyboard..so far they are doing a fine and worthy job

had to get up outta bed...felt drawn to write...followed this impulse and so i find myself here..the carpet feels warm and soft beneath my folded knees..the sounds of manchester permeate the silence...i reflect

what happened that drew me here? when i should be by the narrowmindedness of the 'shoulds' be asleep in preparation for the weekend retreat i am running this weekend...well...as i twisted and restlessly shifted from one pose to another sleep eluding me like a sly mischief maker i began to talk aloud...to myself so i could hear...to the universe as a much missed conversation that has been avoided over the last few days

events over the last few weeks have seen me thrown back down an alley way i thought had been navigated out of my system..caught in this labyrinthe...struggling to find the exit i got stuck...and so without reason or rhyme i began to speak...

i spoke of what i was feeling..i spoke of where i am...of what has held me in a puzzle for days...i named all of it and let my mind pursue the threads of conversation without end, without goal, without the confines of reason...as i told my souls tales, insights started to float up, catching them and rolling with them it all began to make sense...the shifts of my dreams and heart desires that i have spoken of before a few posts ago, that have started to transform, became stronger, clearer and with this a sense of excitement and also peace settled in my heart...i touched myself with my attention, and was touched in return...all is coming more into focus...all is as it is meant to be...all is a gift that just needed time to show its treasures...i am blessed

i realised how much i have changed this year...i felt a newness of purpose...i deeply felt the aches of my hearts true desires, the same as but essentially different to the ones i have clung to for what seems like eternity...i saw what i have to do and what i need to let go of...and most of all, blessedly so, i realised how much i am loved

satiated, at peace, in gratitude and in love...i think its time to try that thing called sleep again..hope your dreams are as sweet as your heart this eve... xxx