40daysbefore40 day 10: my body, no body, some body...to love xxx

its close to midnight...(and no, no michael jackson vibes here!!)

today has been a day of arriving...of feet on the ground...and of napping

hmmmm...napping ;-)

i beleive the spanish are on to a good thing with their siesta vibe, slipping away from the world of awake and the form of the day, into a limbo dreamtime where the unconscious has a lil say in the proceedings...i dont know about you but a hiatus from eyelids open to the growing and unavoidable visual stimulus must be of benefit to the system that stows away underneath the seen

you see, one of the intentions i have offered out to navigate my year ahead is to listen more deeply and with greater reverence to the temple of my body heart and soul

yes this all sounds quite hippy and floaty, but in reality the truth is startlingly different...in order to give the needed attention to the wisdom within requires that i must travel into said temple and face not just the gleaming golden cornices and adornings, but seek to find the nitty gritty that holds the seeds for my steps forwards into the year to follow

take the picture of the 'temple' above...whether a great adoration to the one higher being that we anchor our faith to, in the great temples and structures of ritual and worship around the globe encompassing all forms of belief, or the..ahem..temple of convenience like my local bar that i frequented with a darling beloved friend this evening...and yes it has that name as this pit of sobriety used to be a victorian underground toilet facility!!...ah bless ;-)

or the 'temple' that we live in...because lets face it folks, for all the new age outpourings of devotion to the temple that is our body, at the end of the day, it is a living, breathing, blood pumping, faecal making, hiccup harassing, baby wombing, weeping, seeping, bleeding, sweating machine!!

and thats on a good day

when we are pretty healthy (thank you) and our body isnt attacking us from the inside like some faulty intergalactic alien presence has taken over

my god...our bodies are extraordinary!! whatever intelligence created this vehicle for us to traverse life's paths with has to be a bloody genius...genius and madman i suspect...apparently, according to an astrological book i read many years ago, this is alot like the typical aquarian...they are either geniuses who are awarded the highest accolades, or madmen who find themselves within the confines of an institution...where am i?? erm...i like to think i swing somewhere in the middle tho i have sure had my days of feeling like a lunatic and the days of feeling like a genius?? far too many to mention my darlings of course :-)!!

 the tantrikas beleive we have our bodies and particularly our senses to experience life through to the greatest potential we can expand towards...touch life and each other and enjoy the pleasures of the flesh, taste it and natures produce gifts and your lover, inhale the perfume of this particular moment, open your eyes and revel in the finest glimpses of miracles that we have been priviledged to be shown, and listen truly listen to the sounds of your world, the voices of your loved ones, your breath, your heart, cries of ecstasy and agony...but whatever you do..please please dont dare to waste these gifts..especially dont take them for granted

have you ever pondered the question, that random, oddly perverse asking, that if you had to choose, which of your senses would you lose? if you really really had to give one up?? i dont know about you but i would be very hard pressed to easily offer one up to be taken away from my enjoyment of life

yes yes i know that often its our senses that drive us to excess, to distraction, to losing ourselves, to hovering or falling over the edge of reason...to rolling in the net of suffering...the yogis beleive that it is the attachment to our senses that causes us the pain of suffering that most of us fall prey to...

i get that, i really do, and maybe a few guiness's later the flow of my mind releases just a little bit more than it normally does..but i am a lady who loves the extremes of life...i love the juiciness of life, the pleasures that make me gasp in delight or tear at my heart in bittersweet moments...i wonder sometimes at the 'middle way' whether to resist the pull of temptations leads to a dull and comfortable life...i recall one new year, on a meditation retreat, turning to my friend sat at my side and telling her that i was curious that to live a life such as these beautiful shining monks and nuns did might cause me to become less juicy...i know thats not necessarily the case...i know that when i feel good, centred, grounded, less indulgent, less caught up in the day to day dramas that stretch me into difficult shapes, i feel alive and vibrant

btw...the monk and nun ran away together...true story ;-)

i dont know what it is then that causes me to often tip over into excess... maybe i am a rebel at heart, a child still testing the boundaries of the spirit lead path i have found myself following..maybe i like to beleive that living in indulgent behaviour makes me rock and feel wild, tho these days, i realise more and more that i beleive that my untamed wildness has nothing to do with extremes of behaviour but is more, ironically, about living my truth deeper and deeper no matter what...and my truth is actually, i am quite a sweet and gentle natured gal...god how i have fought the geeky mindset i have resisted all these years... now, at this pivotal gateway i bow to her..she rocks and is wild in her total and utter freedom of self

ok...i realise that this is turning into an essay, but considering i had no idea what to offer this eve i am quite surprised by what has shown itself...

so...the body...

love it

its yours

enjoy it

while it works for you

praise it and keep it in good working order

and make your temple truly madly deeply your own

rock and soul baby, rock and soul!

xxx night night xxx